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Should You be Concerned if Your Child is Shy?
Many times, people think that their child is an introvert because they’re shy. However, the two are vastly different beasts.
An introverted person fairs better when they have alone time, as opposed to spending time with a group of people. They’ll engage with other people when they want to and don’t enjoy being around a large crowd or making small talk in one.
Meanwhile, a shy person doesn’t fair well in a social setting because they feel awkward or worried when they’re around a group of people. It can be worse when they’re in a crowd of individuals that they don’t know. Sometimes they get so nervous that their heart thumps and they get sweaty palms. Often they need to be warmed up to their setting in order to help get over the anxiousness that comes with being shy.
Does your child have an edge because they’re shy?
Being shy is sometimes viewed as something that’s negative, but that’s not the case here.
Have you noticed that while your child may have difficulty interacting with others they seem to be a deep thinker, and normally make well thought out choices? They’re probably very creative because their minds tend to wander further. Once they warm up to the person, they’re talking to they’re also probably a fantastic listener and can hold a conversation. This could be because they care more about what people think about them.
Children and adults who are shy are very much alike; they like to be seen in a positive light. Sometimes this can be negative because they can get tied up looking for that feeling, and struggle to form an authentic identity.
How can I help my child cope with their shyness?
Have you noticed that society accepts extroverted people more often than people who are shy or introverted? That means that your shy child might be struggling to feel accepted. You can help your child by removing judgement and being upset with them because they’re shy.
Next, you must show them that you understand them and their feelings. Don’t ever try to change their shyness, that’s like trying to change their DNA. Help them by modelling positive ‘extroverted’ interaction with others; the chances are that they’ll learn from this and by the time they’re an adult will have mastered this skill. However, if they want to go silent and quiet let them, don’t push them.
If they get anxious over a certain situation, let them face that very situation every now and again. But it’s important to be there for them so in case they start to sink instead of swim. If done right they can grow and swim; maybe the first time they learn how to float, then the next time float and kick, and the time after that float, kick, and paddle.
Don’t be concerned one bit that your child is shy, they’re perfectly normal! If you’re struggling with how to help your child out with their shyness don’t be afraid to seek professional help, it will help them at the end of the day!