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Can You Spot a Narcissist?
Some narcissists are really obvious, you can tell immediately that they are full of themselves. They love themselves like Kanye loves Kanye and adore being the centre of attention. The need for grandiosity is the biggest feature of narcissism. A narcissist will exaggerate their achievements and abilities. Their own needs always come first, and they see the needs of others as a sign of weakness. When people are watching they may appear generous and benevolent, but go cold when they think they’re out of the spotlight.
The above signs are really obvious examples of narcissism. Here are some other signs that you may be dealing with a narcissist:
1: They drop names like it’s hot.
Narcissists rarely think about other people, let alone mention them. Except for two reasons: 1) To blame the offending person for something 2) to associate themselves with fame, beauty, or power.
2: They always need “the best”.
They always want the ‘best’ doctor, lawyer, hairstylist, etc. They need to be seen in the hottest bars, or the most luxurious cars. Image is everything to them.
3: They are always looking to what’s next.
Narcissists start out with an idealised view of the situation but quickly abandon ship when things get real. They always think they can do better, which is why you’ll find them flitting from job to job and relationship to relationship.
4: They think they’re all that and a bag chips.
Sometimes people think that narcissists only act the way they do because deep down they loathe themselves. However, a true narcissist really does believe they are the best.
5: They need you to think they’re all that.
A narcissist thrives on attention and praise. They don’t need you to like them per se, just to recognise their awesomeness.
When you’ve realised that you’re dealing with a narcissist what should you do?
1: Don’t engage.
The easiest way to win the game is to not play.
If you must engage, be patient and set clear boundaries. You are not about to change their behaviour, and pointing it out often only makes things worse. Know that the narcissist does not have your best interests at heart and set your expectations up accordingly.